Courage or Foolishness

 I'm rereading a book by Osho called Courage: The Joy of Living Dangerously. My partner's away for the night and our son is out with his friend so it's just me and the dog.

I tried watching ANY thing but that didn't fare well and opted to turn the TV off and enjoy the silence. It's really nice out and you can hear the wind, crickets and occasional barking of neighborhood dogs.

I'm moving cross-country alone and I haven't even packed yet. Granted I'm only bringing clothes, and whatever I can fit in the car. Maybe it's not a full-on move so the weight of it hasn't hit me yet. 

I'm reading this book again maybe to help comfort myself that I'm doing what's necessary for my growth, trying the unknown again after moving to DC without knowing a single soul. 16 years later and I've built a little village of loved ones.  Part of me is wondering why I wanna leave that behind now? 

I'll miss the sensation of having my dog sleep on my leg. Taking this picture to help capture the moment I suppose. The little ball of warmth leaning against my thigh. Now I'm sad, though not sure why since we're in this space together.I've had him for 10 years shy of 20 days, and will he be ok? Or would I be ok? 

As the day I'm heading west comes close, every tasks takes on a different meaning. It's like they're more precious now than they were a year, or even 2 months ago.